One of these days I’ll catch them.
This isn’t the first time our house pixies have taken my stuff and hidden it. My favorite necklace disappeared for nearly two years, eventually reappearing at the bottom of my husband’s sock drawer. My beaded earrings vanished, emerging a year later from inside the piano bench. My binoculars left their shelf, ultimately materializing in the back of the kitchen cupboard behind the oatmeal.
I consulted the wise women in my life — my best friend, daughter-in-law and granddaughter. All of them agreed. Pixies did it. There was no other rational explanation.
Pixies are not evil, but they are mischievous. Little pranksters. They sneak around the house at night and hide things in strange places. More to the point, they hide my things. I have been patient with them. Good-natured. I’ve kept my sense of humor through years of pixie-related criminal activity.
But now, they’ve gone too far. Today I went to get dressed and all my bras were gone. The stretchy sports bras I wear around the house under tee shirts are where they should be, but all the nice ones from Victoria’s Secret are gone. All of them. The white ones, the beige ones, the black ones. The expensive ones.
Even at my most paranoid, I do not believe anyone in this house would steal my underwear. It wouldn’t fit anyone and if we’d been burglarized, I think they’d have taken jewelry or antiques, not undergarments.
I went through every drawer of both my dressers. Even though we haven’t gone on a vacation in nearly a year (and I’ve worn them since then), I searched all my overnight bags. I also searched the shelf in my closet. Nothing.
The pixies are at it again.
We were on our way to a birthday party, so after an hour of futile searching, I finally gave up and wore whatever I could find that wouldn’t show under my lovely new scoop neck blouse. How come the pixies never mess with Garry’s stuff (though my necklace did turn up in his sock drawer)? Probably that’s why he doesn’t take me seriously. He said I shouldn’t worry because everything would all show up somewhere. Missing stuff always does. Eventually. But it can be a long time. Regardless, we had to leave. No more time to search and nowhere to look I hadn’t already checked at least twice.
Why can’t we have well-mannered pixies who clean the house while we sleep? Nice, friendly pixies. Helpful pixies. Pixies who cook, deliver groceries, wash cars or groom dogs.
Pixies, you are on notice! I will find you and make you return my underwear. Look out pesky pixies! I’m coming for you.
- For The Promptless – S. 2, E. 8 – Cryptozoology (thequeencreative.wordpress.com)
- Crytozoologically Speaking (fishofgold.net)
- ForThePromptless – S. 2, Ep. 4 – A Total Monet (rarasaur.wordpress.com)
- Awesome Arcane Words (fishofgold.net)
- Overwhelmed By My Obsession (aprobertsstories.wordpress.com)
- FOR THE PROMPTLESS – Confession of a Logomaniac (teepee12.com)
- FOR THE PROMPTLESS – MONOMYTH: The Cardinal and the Cat (teepee12.com)