I NEED A COSTUME!

Despite my passion for masked heroes, I always preferred Superman to Batman. There were a couple of reasons. Superman was genuinely super. Invulnerable. And moreover, HE COULD FLY!

Never underestimate a guy who can fly at supersonic speeds. A boyfriend like that could prove most useful on a day-to-day basis. I mean really. Hey, Supe, can you give me a hand moving to that new apartment ?

Me Not Super

Hey, Supe … the roof leaks … could you take a look at it? And that big boulder in the backyard is ruining my plans for the new garage. You think you might relocate it for me? And if you have some extra time, maybe you could build a foundation for the garage while you are at it? It will just take a couple of minutes …

Marilyn again

So, I’m a Superman kind of gal.

Above and beyond those delightful and useful powers, I loved that no one recognizes him when he wears his glasses. As a long-time eyeglass wearer, I tried it myself.

“Garry,” I say to get his attention. I then whip my glasses off, stare meaningfully into his eyes and ask β€œWho am I?”

He laughs. So I do it again, but he just laughs harder.Β I persist and try this on friends, relatives and near total strangers, but alas, no one thinks I’m Wonderwoman or Supergirl.

Do you think I need a costume? Is my white hair too much of a give-away?

If I get myself a costume — a really good costume with a cape and everything — do you think maybe I could fly? Because that’s what it’s all about. Flying. And becoming invulnerable. That would be good too.

45 thoughts on “I NEED A COSTUME!

  1. I too am a big fan of men in tights. Any superhero who counts on gadgets to survive is fooling himself. I want powers built in. Even Green Lantern has to recharge his ring. I love guys like The Flash or the Fantastic 4. Supergirl is a hottie. I used to dream I could fl as a kid. It was cool being able to get way above the earth or visit anywhere on the planet in seconds. Think of the photo ops? πŸ™‚

    Like

  2. Thank you for the morning laugh. Just having a superman to fly to the pharmacy to pick up the prescription I forgot, and it is 5 minutes to closing, would be priceless. I have been saying that my next husband (number 2) will be one who loves to cook, now I think I have changed my mind. Thank you so much. πŸ˜€

    Like

                • I actually have reasons why I don’t like cell phones. I’m not being stupidly stubborn.

                  Useful though they can be on the road, they are good for almost everything except their original purpose: making phone calls. The audio quality is pathetic. They disconnect randomly and often. I need reading glasses to actually see anything on the screen. I could forgive everything else if I could make a phone call — or for that matter receive one — and know I’d be able to communicate with the other party with a reasonable likelihood of holding the connection, hearing and being heard. Oddly, the old cell phones, the big klutzy ones we had back in the 90s, were better telephones than the iPhone or any other phone you can get now. Today’s phones are little entertainment centers. But I don’t NEED an entertainment center. I need a portable TELEPHONE.

                  As for taking pictures on my phone, why? I carry a compact point and shoot wherever I go. It has a superzoom and takes high quality pictures. I like cameras. I have a lot of them. I don’t need my phone to be a camera. Or a movie theater. Or to listen to music (with speakers that tinny, I don’t see the attraction). I need — a telephone.

                  I know the younger generations would rather text, but they were born with pointy little thumbs. I have slow, lumpy thumbs designed for grasping tools … the advanced monkey version of thumbs.

                  So I don’t like cell phones, or more accurately, I don’t like the cell phones they make these days. They are light, small, cute … and useless for making phone calls. Which is the only use I have for them. For everything else, I have several computers, many cameras, readers, a GPS, several radios, CD players. DVD players, televisions or music players.

                  Like

    • He was a likeable hero. Modest, unassuming, incredibly powerful, a good solid career … and he had excellent manners. Mothers would approve. Fathers would feel their daughters were safe. I always worried about what would happen if he got carried away during, uh, intimate contact. Would he come and blow a hole right through you?

      Like

Talk to me!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s