A PLEA FROM THE WOMAN WITH THE VISA

Ah, the holidays. Oh the joys of shopping. All I can say is ‘THANK YOU ONLINE WORLD” because I no longer need to go to the mall for my holiday shopping. It gets delivered to my door and usually, it’s on time and in the same number of pieces it started out its journey. Sometimes, change is good.

Stuff my dog taught me

imagesDEAR TRENDY CLOTHING STORE EMPLOYEE:

I know that everything in your store has been designed to fit and flatter my teenage daughters and that my presence is an unappreciated reminder that you will all someday sacrifice beauty for comfortable footwear.  However, as the woman with the VISA, I have no choice but to lurk around the racks and there will be occasions when verbal communication between you and I will be unavoidable.

To reduce my stress levels as well as yours I plea with you to consider lowering the music volume and perhaps turning up the lighting.  I could potentially lip read over the pounding, highly-synthesized rhythm, if only there was enough light for me to make out your facial features.  Alternatively, I could have my children verbally guide me through the store if I could make out their voices over the dance-party “mash up” that is playing at a stadium-concert…

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Categories: Anecdote, Humor, Shopping

Tags: , , , , , ,

6 replies

  1. So true! I couple of weekend ago my son and I went into Hollister. OH. MY. GOODNESS. It was very dim. The music really was blaring. (I kind of felt like I was at some house party.) There were clothes all over the place, including the floor. (Maybe that makes teens feel at home?) It was an utter mess, and having worked in retail for many years….kind of embarrassing. The only good thing of that visit was the time I spent with my son. I SO LOVE online shopping these days. My kids send me links to things they want with sizes and colors noted. After having picked out too many “perfect” gifts that were not desired, I ask for multiple suggestions for me to choose from. That way, they are happy and still surprised.

    Like

  2. Love this essay. Totally share some of the thoughts. Funny and to the point.

    Like

  3. True and hilarious, thanks for passing this along.

    Liked by 1 person

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