Daily Prompt: Cut Off – When was the last time you felt really, truly lonely?

72-flying junco-Birds-II_055

Until this morning when I saw this prompt, I was feeling pretty good about the friends and relationships I’ve formed during the past three years of blogging. Now why would you go and ask this question? The people who write these prompts must be very young. They are forever bringing up depressing topics that are real downers. Only the young think it’s fun to explore bad times.

But here’s a real, no kidding, response. Because Garry and I were talking about this very thing last night before bed.

Years ago, when I moved to Israel, I was suddenly a single mother in a new country with no friends, or acquaintances. Most people spoke English only a little and the customs were different. Emigrating to another country and culture is hard, but that’s what I signed up for. I wanted culture shock. I wanted something different, new. I wanted to tough it out and discover I could do it on my own. I was just 30 and I was ready to take on the world.


It has been a long time since I felt that way. Nothing I could do in my native land and language, could match or exceed the isolation of being on my own on foreign soil.

Of course I felt lonely and isolated. I really was isolated. It wasn’t a mood I was in, or a feeling. It was reality, even though it was in a place I had chosen. With all its perils, change is healthy.

I am not lonely anymore. Being physically challenged, if this were even 25 years ago, I probably would be. The Internet lets me reach out and find friends all over the world. You — yes, you with your pot of tea and crumpets — have rocked my world. You are my friends, my support. How can I be lonely with wonderful friends like you?

72-two juncos winter Birds-II_046

Across continents and oceans, from every corner and culture around the globe, you are my friends. I have a whole world full of friends. What a wonder this blogging thing has turned out to be!

Categories: Animals, Blogging, Daily Prompt, Friendship, Israel, Photography, Relationships

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59 replies

  1. First of all I love your bird photos. They are wonderful. Next, what you said is so true- blogging allows us to make connections with people from all over, exchange thoughts and ideas and make new friends. It opens up our world- we know we are never alone!


  2. Don’t you think they might make the little mistake in not differentiating being alone and being lonely? As I think it is a massive difference between the two. And I felt, while reading a couple of those posts, that so many in my eyes rather talk about feeling alone than about truly being lonely…


  3. I really enjoy my blogging friends. I have friends all around the world which makes watching the news more meaningful – I am more aware of what is going on outside my little town.


  4. I feel the same way about blogging. I have so many friends in all corners of the world, something I never could have imagined as a kid pre-WWW.


    • Me neither. Even 10 years ago, the ease of communication around the world was not like it is today. The speed of WiFi, the power of computers, the stability of connections have improved SO MUCH. In 1990, I was working on line, cross continent, Boston to Berkeley, California. I was using 2400 modem … so slow that no modern computer would even connect at that speed, but it was REALLY fast in 1990. Ten years later, speed was — what, 10 times faster? And now it’s 10 times faster than that? Can it be any faster than pretty much instantaneous? The kids who grew up with this take it all in stride, but I remember, because it wasn’t so long ago, when it wasn’t like this.


      • I miss letters.., hand written letters. I feel a part of that person is contained in and on a letter..just the style and penmanship alone was personal. Plus the thought that that person had actually touched that letter to write, fold and place it in an envelop meant, somehow, more than all the emails I’ve ever gotten. Yet we have all been sucked in and are fascinated with the instant and constant communication this new technology provides.


        • I was never much on handwriting anything. I learned to touch type at 10 and have been hitting the keys ever since. I don’t think I have a handwriting anymore, at least not that anyone (including me!) can read. I know what you mean, though. I used to get letters from friends and penpals and they meant a great deal. On the other hand, Garry sent me a thousand letters in the years I was in Israel. He typed every one of them, but they meant the world to me. I guess for me it’s the sentiment, not the format.

          Did you catch any of the Oscars, by the way? Worst audio EVER! For that amount of money, you’d think they could hire someone who knows how to use mikes and which ones to use!

          A final note: On the other post this morning, the snow poster was taken using the PL-5 with a 14 mm f2.8 Panny lens on it. The effect was in-camera, not Photoshop. The PL 5 does the MOST interesting (and highest quality) effects I’ve ever seen … all kinds of stuff none of my other cameras will do at all. I never even tried a lot of this before, but things like its monochrome (sepia, light sepia, black and white, etc.) setting produce phenomenal results.


  5. A different country, a different language can be scary and intimidating at the beginning. Been there…done that :-). I do agree with you, they have lots of negative topics or maybe it’s just being older finding it depressing, because it MAKES us relive for a short while our past.


  6. I spent too many years being lonely. I finally just gave up and it turns to despair. Now that you can cure, that the doctors have a pill for. There’s no magic pill for loneliness. You can be lonely in a room full of people. Been there, done that.

    My last wife taught me there are worse things than being alone. For that I am eternally grateful for I’ve never felt lonely since. I have come to accept who I am, my limitations and probable future, alone.


  7. Even moving from one side of the US to the other can be isolating. We might — technically — speak the same language, but there’s a barrier just the same. I got a lot of, “Yer not from around here, are you?” (think deep Southern accent, hillbilly style) when I moved to Mississippi. And in the South, they are very polite to you face to face, but don’t expect them to invite you to dinner… like, ever. Bless their hearts. ^_^

    Luckily, I’m comfortable in my own skin so I don’t mind spending time alone. But you’re right, young people these days confuse bored with lonely because many of them are conditioned to look for outside stimulation, and when they cannot find it, well then they must be lonely.


    • Also, I think of you as a friend too. So there’s that. ^_^


      • And me to you, too. We form some pretty strong bonds. It’s not all that different than pen pals were “back in the day.” There were some pretty intense relationships conducted via mail.


        • I remember pen pals! Waiting for weeks to get mail from all over the world. I had some of mine for years before we drifted apart. I just moved to often to keep in touch.


          • I had a Japanese pen pal when I was a kid. We drifted apart when we both went off to college, but it was a great friendship for many years.


            • I had a Japanese pen pal who lived in, get this, Australia. That was interesting. 🙂


              • When I lived in Israel, I hung out with a bunch of Aussies. Fellow English speakers, you see. It turns out there’s a lot of population exchange between Australia, New Zealand, and the far east because they are relatively close to each other. Not like the US and Canada, but if you are Australian, nothing is that close. I learned a lot from spending time with people from the other side of the world. It was fun, too.

                Liked by 1 person

    • I think some of us also confuse bored with hungry. I think I gained about 100 pounds of boredom one year. At work, not at home. At home, I’m never bored and I may forget to eat. But in the office, work was often stultifying. Eating was the only available break. The choices were candy, candy, candy … and potato chips. In the high tech biz, that’s health food.


      • My hubby has the same problem. I remember that problem well. Boredom has been on my mind a lot lately because I realize that there was a time before television, before computers, before books even when people had over twelve hours of daylight to fill and it wasn’t always work work work. What did they do?


        • Read. Write. And I think it really WAS work work work. There was a lot of time consuming housework, yard work, paperwork. A lot of it has been either eliminated or automated.


          • I’ve read a lot of housekeeping books from that time period, so I understand that, but from what I’ve read of them, there was also a lot of time to fill too. That’s what “visiting” was for. ahahahaha. Those are… interesting… books.

            Liked by 1 person

  8. Yes yes yes ! We are friends ! I love this communication and guidance received from seniors. Tea has procured with care, freshly plucked from tea gardens of West Bengal for some special friends. Cheers to small small joys of life 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • It is the best tea I’ve ever tasted! Completely unlike tea I’ve bought here or even the stuff my mom brought back from Hong Kong years ago. It’s WONDERFUL.

      Liked by 1 person

      • You liked it, the efforts paid off well. I will convey it to the tea garden owner. I will try to send some red tea also, once ready to be plucked. Right now leaves are very tender.


        • Fresh tea is completely unlike what passes for tea in the U.S. It is not the same beverage at all. It’s like the difference between the tired old long grain white rice we normally buy and the sushi rice I’ve learned to look for. That’s hard to find, too. Moreover, Americans don’t know one rice from another, so I usually have to go to a town where they have an Asian grocery store. Tea is unavailable unless you have friends who live, as you do, where it grows.

          Liked by 1 person

          • Rice is next on the list. will try to send high quality Basmati ( premium variety) rice, in small quantity.


            • Americans (mostly) don’t “get” rice unless they come from an Asian or Indian background. It isn’t a standard part of the American diet the way it is in the east. We, on the other hand, eat more rice than any other kind of starch, including potatoes and bread. I have a rice cooker, too.

              Liked by 1 person

              • Wow Perfect ! You will love the flavor of Basmati long grain rice. The fragrance is so tempting for neighbors, hard to resist. I wish we live close by. I could have send you Naga chillies, the spiciest in the world, sold for Rs. 2000 for 250 gms in departmental stores. I just picked it up from Nagaland fields during my short stay there.


                • We have some pretty intense chili peppers. From Texas, the Caribbean, the southwest … it will peel the paint off your car or maybe remove your tonsils without surgery. My brother was passionate about hot peppers. He must have had a hundred different kinds of sauce, dried and fresh peppers. It was his thing 🙂 He decorated his house with chili pepper decor.

                  Liked by 1 person

  9. Am with you all the way. I think pulling up roots and moving to another country is one of the lonliest things you can do. I did it as well, but even that can be overcome. It needs a little time and patience but when contacts are made you are no longer lonely. Today is a prompt I never wrote, a new experience almost. I share your blogging experiences and yes it is good to see the familiar bloggers daily, to read what they have to say.


    • Right you are. And we emigrated by choice. We weren’t forced out by war or famine or political unrest. So you have to expect some loneliness, discomfort, culture shock. It is uncomfortable until the new place becomes home, no longer a strange land. Language is a big issue, I think. If I had spoken Hebrew, it would have made the transition much easier.

      I count on seeing you every day. I look for you and if you aren’t there, I worry that something happened to you. We have a bond.


  10. Very, very true, the internet has opened a whole new world and sitting at home:)


    • It has changed the world for everyone, but for those of us with limited mobility … it’s freedom.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Agree about internet. And this comes from the guy who screamed about computers replacing typewriters. Yesterday, I spent more than 2 hours on Facebook with a pal just exchanging really silly lists about women who would stiffen the creases in our jeans. We wound up laughing at ourselves. We were both serious “journalists” in our working lives.


        • I always laugh when kids say that “old people” don’t know computers. We know them just fine and depend on them more than do those children. They make a lot of assumptions and do a lot of stereotyping about what “old” is about. Old people are just kids who survived youth. I LOVE my computer. LOVE it. REALLY love it.


  11. I completely idenitfy. There are people here in the blogosphere that I actually miss when they don’t post for a few days. Heart speaks to heart, I think, through our writing and sharing of things we may not say anywhere else. Never lonely, for sure.


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