A rerun (with editing) from 2013. Shorter. Pithier. No less true.

Asking for help is easy. Getting it may not be.

I don’t mean getting someone to review your post or help you carry a heavy box up the stairs. Those are easy things, no big deal. You’ll happily do such things for anyone, even a stranger … and they for you.

What about when you can’t manage the basic stuff of life on your own anymore? When a bag of groceries is too heavy? When a flight of stairs looms Everest?

Ask you family for help? They’re busy. Maybe they can find a little time around Thanksgiving. Or New Year’s.

“But I need help today!” The silence is deafening.

Growing older has plenty of good, solid reasons for fear. Real issues of being left to the care of unfriendly strangers, unable to manage day-to-day tasks are more than a little scary. There’s nothing psychological about them.


Everyone would rather not need help. Universally, people prefer self-sufficiency. When that’s no longer an option, the world has a frozen, dark look. It’s not your world any more.

There are boulders in the middle of your life. Immovable. Huge, heavy, solid. Waiting.

Author: Marilyn Armstrong

Writer, photography, blogger. Previously, technical writer. I am retired and delighted to be so. May I live long and write frequently.

22 thoughts on “ROCKS. BOULDERS. LIFE.”

  1. I have such a hard time asking for help, but realize I might need to in the future. I have always been on my own and liked the independence. It’s hard to ask “please open this water for me” because the twisting motion hurts. I am not sure if I will get used to it…it sucks.


  2. I am woman so need no help, altough I wouldn’t mind some now and again. What to do when your other half has the same complaints and problems. today he said the magic words “After all I am 75 years old” – oh dear, let’s forget the whole thing


  3. At least we can talk about it. I remember something my mother said many years ago. “Sometimes we live too long.” For those of you who are looking for another 100 + well it won’t be me.


      1. Yah….it’s that youth thing. Perhaps there’s a rationale in that. We need fresh blood and new ideas to progress as a society. If it were just us doing the same old, same old we’d be in big trouble.


          1. Some of the world’s problems remain much the same. Other problems are rather new. We are coming out of the industrialization of the West and heading in new directions. Just where those directions will lead, we don’t know.


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