Hello everyone! I am the 35 year-old “success story,” David, that my mother Ellin wrote about in this blog entry. I put success story in quotes because, like all of us, I am still a work in progress. Frankly, have not entirely let go of the demons of growing up — and living with ADHD.
I have a few thoughts to share, especially with those still battling these demons, parents with ADD and ADHD children, as well other family members who face these challenges.
It’s easier as an adult to see the strengths of having ADHD (hyper focus, for example), than to see it as a child. However, it doesn’t have to be that way, at least completely.
Everyone can benefit from what I was taught in college and learned on my own about dealing with learning disabilities. ADHD or LD is not a prerequisite to benefiting from being embraced and embracing yourself as an individual. I have seven non-verbal learning disabilities as well as ADHD. There was and is a lot of stuff going on.
Focus on your strengths. Use them combat your weaknesses.
No one is good at everything. Some of us are square pegs and will never fit in typically round holes. Concentrate on things you are good at. Build your career of things you do well and about which you are passionate.
Of course you need to get through school first, but even there, by focusing on what makes you special and unique, you can push through, in college more so than high school.
In college, the answer is more important than how you reach the conclusion. That’s where I struggled in high school. I would say, “I can get the answer, but not your way.” That never seemed good enough. In college, and even more in the professional world, answers are critical. Unique perspectives can prove good, as well as profitable.
Be organized! Find a way to do it comfortably and effectively. Organization helps everyone.
Never forget that everyone is an individual and unique. Encouraging all youngsters to do what they are good at and rewarding them for it would help everyone. Further, instead of telling everyone they are a “winner,” which, even to children seems disingenuous, reward them for what they do well. Help them develop a sense of purpose and pride in their individuality.
Bottom Line
Everyone should be taught to embrace what they do well and not forced to focus on what they do poorly. Especially not at the same time.
Everyone needs to learn math even if writing is their specialty, but if you focus on figuring out what makes someone good at writing, it will help them with math and other studies.
This would be a big improvement educationally for every child, ADHD or not.
Categories: Disabilities, Education, learning, Personal
Great article! I’m curious about the tree pic you used here. I would love to use it for my school website. Is it something you came up with?
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I found it on an educational site on the internet. I think the site name is on the picture. Thanks for visiting!
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I am so happy for you David. I guess all that’s left is to use your gift wisely.
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I try! In many ways I feel blessed and stronger having been challenged my entire life. I would not be who I am today without those struggles. Not saying I am glad I had them, but I am making the best of it. Everyone has to.
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Thank you for showing us from your eyes. My son has dyslexia – but has manged to get good grades for his first year of college studying computer systems. As a parent it is hard to focus on the positive when it is so hard to see it. But I have always told my son he is smart and will do well. I tell him all the time that I am proud of him and how far he has come. That is so important to hear as it is something to keep you going. It focuses on you as a person, not how others may see you. You are an inspiration to others.
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Thank you RE being an inspiration! That means a lot to me. Sounds like you did a great job with your son by building him up and telling him you are proud of him.
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David, thanks for the great read. It certainly resonates here. I hope others read and understand.
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Thank you Gary! I hope the message helps other people as well.
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Forced learning wouldn’t be my idea of learning at all.
Leslie
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I don’t think it’s anyone’s … at the learning end, anyway. Maybe there are some at the teaching end who thing force-feeding stuff is the way to go … but I hope not.
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It kills free thought.
Leslie
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