REVEAL TO CONCEAL

REVEAL TO CONCEAL

As much as we reveal in our blogging, we also intentionally conceal a lot. I’m sure it’s not just me. I prefer to not expose the rusting underbody of our lives to the world at large.

Marilyn and Garry by Bette Stevens

Marilyn and Garry by Bette Stevens

I do not blog about every tiff I have with my husband or anyone else. I don’t go into the sordid details of every passing  virus, sniffle, or stomach ache. Or the gory details of our lack-of-financial life.

garry laughing

Why not? Because it’s no one’s business but ours — and also, because it’s not very interesting. Whining is boring. My own included.

I know people who are in constant crisis mode and post all of it on Facebook. They present themselves as the most unlucky people on Earth because everything always happens to them.

A pipe breaks? “OMG we’re doomed!”

Flu strikes? “Why am I afflicted by the gods? Why is the universe punishing me?”

A lost cell phone? “The sky is falling, the sky is falling.”

72-Cherrie-Garry-Amherst_02

The other day, it struck me that we (and probably you, too) have as many of these bumps in your road of life as anyone else. Maybe more. We just don’t document each and every one … unless they make a good story. It’s always worth the virtual ink if I can make someone laugh.

Garry silly with dogs 30

Part of the pleasure of blogging is we get to present ourselves and our lives in a positive way. Unless you blog for sympathy and some people do. In our virtual world, we can be our best, most entertaining selves. If this presentation conceals our pain and misery and gives others a skewed idea of us? Who says “full disclosure” is what blogging is about?

Marilyn by Garry

Writing about all the grimy and grim details of day-to-day life is like posting ugly selfies. Why in the world would anyone want to do that?

I’d rather make you laugh. I’d rather make me laugh, too. And maybe, just sometimes, maybe (along the way) I make a point or two worth thinking about.



Categories: Blogging, Daily Prompt, Humor, Life, Personal, Photography

Tags: , , , , , , ,

41 replies

  1. Absolutely! I remember my parents saying,”You never discuss politics, religion, or sex outside the family.” If you had a problem, you kept it to yourself and your loved ones and worked it out. My own privacy does not mean I cannot commiserate with others’ ailments or not try to help when I can. It’s just that they don’t need my adding to the mix with personal lamentations.

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  2. Great pix and post and I’m smiling… 🙂

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  3. Thanks for blogging. I enjoy reading your posts. I have decided to reveal to you that I am not really a grey squirrel but a middle aged man with a beer belly. Hope that was not TOO much info… 🙂

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  4. You are right Marilyn. most of us have worries of some kind, our health, family members health, including the furry members, money, stupid arguements over things that don’t matter. Sometimes it’s good to have a little rant like when you have been on hold for 45 minutes before being directed to a website that isn’t working, but not all the time. Those folk must enjoy being miserable.

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    • Some of them have forgotten how to be anything BUT miserable.Even when something good happens, they can find a way to suffer. It’s a habit. Also, they like the attention they get from being in a constant state of crisis. Especially on Facebook where any tale of woe, no matter how silly, is sure to get a lot of random readers saying “I understand, you poor poor thing.” I try not to encourage them.

      In the middle of the long drought of last summer, one of these friends of mine (she’s not a virtual friend, either … she lives a few miles away and I’ve known her for quite a while) complained when it finally rained. ONE rainy day out of two months of sunshine, and she was wailing about the miserable weather. I actually did jump in and yell at her, virtually. Good grief. We were almost 15 inches low in the water table and she’s whining about rain? She has gotten so bad I never voluntarily see her. Bad enough to have her on my Facebook page, but in the flesh, it’s chalk squeaking across the blackboard 🙂

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  5. Facebook has been the biggest boon for those who absolutely, positively HAVE to be the center of attention. Knew a person like that once…. turned her into one of my characters. They can be extremely fun, but my God, the constant drama! I find misfortunes better to talk about after the point in which you can look back on them and laugh…

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    • I realized, reading some of the people on my “friend” list, that it’s not that they have MORE drama than we do. It’s just they consider EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENS as drama. I couldn’t maintain that level of hysteria. I’d make myself nuts. Time makes most of my drama into funny stories.

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  6. I agree. Too much information about every little problem is such a big turn off

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    • I find my own complaints boring, so why would I be fascinated by someone else’s? I will listen endlessly to a friend or loved one. But that’s personal. It’s not to my mind, what blogging is about. For me, blogging fun, entertainment, sometimes information and/or education. What it isn’t is psychotherapy — with me as the therapist.

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  7. I often wonder whether social media has taken the place of grandma in the rocker by the kitchen stove and the village it takes to raise a child.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. What’s this? Are you moaning about the moaners? 😉

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  9. You and many of us try to post the ‘cream’ and let everyone enjoy themselves. I think most of us have our own dose of reality to deal with. Nice photos of you guys. 🙂

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  10. You always have a great story to tell, Marilyn.
    Leslie

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  11. Your pictures are great.

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  12. Completely agree, always look on the bright side of life, there is a funny to everything, although sometimes to have to search for it.

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    • We’ve all got our own bag of rocks to haul. A real crisis is one thing … but too many people don’t seem to get the difference between a glitch and a catastrophe. I really know people who think EVERYTHING is a calamity. They are the bloggers or posters who cry wolf every day.

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      • I know them. As you say we all have our problems, but I don’t spread them on Internet. What really annoys me are the lowlifes that have to rant and swear about their “friends” on Facebook and worst their colleagues that nod their keyboards with likes and yes and I agree and add a few more profanities to the ones that are already there.

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  13. Hear, hear, Marilyn. I’m with you on all fronts 🙂

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  14. I’m glad you added the phrase, “unless they make a good story.” Many of my most popular posts were based on mishaps in my personal life. I still don’t quite understand why people read that crap, but they do.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. You took the words right out of my mouth! This is brilliant, and so true!

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  16. I love the photo of you two in your Serendipity sweatshirts! Too cute!

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  17. OMG!! I have a little thingy on my nose. My nose is sore. My throat is sore. My eyes are red. My bones are aching. Oh, the misery! Hold on! That little nose thingy was dirt. I just washed it off. I have lots to share with my PCP today.
    Mother of mercy…

    Liked by 1 person

  18. nodding my head in ferocious agreement. I do the same thing on my own blog–no politics, no religious hysterics, and if I can’t make it funny, maybe I can make it at least interesting or thoughtful. Often I feel like Im writing a news column and run with it that way.
    But no, I dont show stitches, I don’t discuss medical stuff unless it’s funny, or necessary, or both. Of course, someone else’s blog is fair game, if they want to discuss politics or religion or major illnesses, im right there, as Ms. Opinionated, fists waving in their air, not mine =).

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    • I figure if someone wants to put it all out there, they can’t suddenly object when everyone in the universe sticks his or her oar in their water.

      Some people have real, serious, life and sanity threatening problems. Their blogs are aimed at a community of people with similar problems or who have some knowledge of these problems. That’s different. But I know people who truly believe that a boil on their butt is headline news. OY VAY.

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