Relax. Chill. Take it easy, dude. Whatever it is, it can wait. Hurrying won’t get you anywhere faster, at least not anywhere you want to go.

1 – Everyone has ancestors that go back to the dawn of time. Just, some of you know their names.

2 – A good genetic package will keep you alive and kicking better and longer than even the healthiest lifestyle. I know a lot of people who indulged in orgies of drugs, booze, and all kinds of bad behavior. It looks like they will outlive all of us.

Mick Jagger and Keith Richards - The Rolling Stones are still rolling along, and gathering no moss.

Mick Jagger and Keith Richards – The Rolling Stones are still rolling along, and gathering no moss.

3 – It’s not what you don’t know that will get you. It’s what you do know that’s wrong.

4 – The truth will not set you free, but if you shout it from the rooftops, it will get you incarcerated.

uxbridge jail

5 – In the arts, dogged determination cannot overcome an absence of talent.

6 – In the real world, you don’t get medals for being “the hardest tryer.”

7 – Size matters.


8 – Your opinion is not as good as anybody else’s. An opinion backed by study, knowledge and genuine insight is better than yours.

9 – The hare beat the tortoise, but the tortoise had a better public relations department. History is written by the winners.

10 – You cannot always achieve your dream, no matter how hard you work. Sometimes, you need to go back to sleep, then dream something different.

Relax. It’s just life. Roll like a stone, slither like a snake, buzz like a bee. Wait for signs.



Our family consisted of two dogs and two humans. Then our 16-year-old dog, Lucky, died and we were down to three beings in the household. We had some anxieties about bringing another dog into our lives. We worried about finding the right dog. We feared the disruption and tension the wrong dog could cause.

Our worries are over. We lucked into the perfect dog to complete our foursome. The process was fairly smooth. Except for the fact that my husband wanted nothing to do with it! He hates the idea of choosing one dog out of the thousands of rescue dogs who desperately need homes. So I had to do all the ‘shopping’.


I zeroed in on local rescue groups because we needed to introduce our dog, Lexi, to any potential adoptee. We had to make sure two dogs got along. I chose to meet one dog, Remy, who was described as sweet and cuddly. That’s exactly what we need. We are couch potatoes and would be a bad fit for an athletic, highly energetic, outdoorsy dog.

We met Remy and she was very reserved. However, she went right over to Tom and sat down leaning up against him. That bonded Tom to her immediately. Then she said hello to me and lay down on a dog bed in the room. The dog trainer making the introduction said that Remy had never done that with anyone else. She said that meant that Remy was comfortable and relaxed with us. To Tom, that meant that she was choosing us as her new family.

I insisted on meeting another dog because I didn’t want to feel I had blindly gone with the first dog we met. The other dog was adorable but there was something about Remy.

Remy and Tom

Remy and Tom

So we arranged for the rescue people to bring Remy to the house to meet Lexi. At first it didn’t go very well. Remy was scared and overwhelmed in the new environment. She wanted nothing to do with the overly enthusiastic Lexi. The rescue trainer said that this might not be the right dog for us and we were heartbroken. But we decided to give Remy 48 hours to adjust and relax. The rescue trainer said that if things were still not going well, we could bring Remy back to the rescue shelter, no problem. He assured us that this happens all the time. However, for us, that would have been devastating. We were already invested in this delightful eight month old puppy.

Fortunately we didn’t have to wait too long for the two dogs to decide they liked playing together. Within hours they were chasing each other around the back yard and wrestling like old pals. We were so relieved! We had been instantly smitten with this sweet and goofy pup.


Each day has brought new levels of comfort and accommodation. Now I can feed the two dogs next to one another instead of in separate rooms. They can now both be on the bed without growling or any other territorial conversations. They play together, rest together and share our attention amicably. We’ve even noticed that Lexi is more relaxed and less clingy to me. That is a bonus we hadn’t even hoped for! And it hasn’t been a full week yet!

Remy & Lexi

Remy & Lexi

We hadn’t fully realized how down we were after the death of our Lucky. We weren’t aware how empty the house had felt with only one, not very happy dog. We are suddenly so upbeat and joyful. We are reveling in our newfound enthusiasm for each new day with our wonderful Remy. We are laughing all the time at her antics and smiling over the connection the two dogs are forging with each other. We couldn’t have asked for a happier ending for all of us.


Expect the unexpected, because something will happen. Always.

When I was newly back from Israel, I took a three-day weekend from my new job to visit friends in San Diego. I bought a carry-on bag (I love luggage). Got tickets to San Diego — not easy because flights to California from New York typically end in Oakland, SF, or LA — none of which are close to San Diego. I finally found one with just a single connection. That was as good as it would get, so I took it along with all my vacation time at work.

I got to La Guardia on time and ready to go, but the plane never made it. Four hours later, the plane was MIA and my connecting flight in Salt Lake City came and went without me. I demanded my money back

The perky young thing at the ticket counter explained, “These are non-refundable tickets. See? It says so right here. We can get you on a flight to Los Angeles tomorrow afternoon. How’s that?” My sense of humor had gone missing with my aircraft.

“Los Angeles is more than 3 hours drive from San Diego and I don’t have a car. By the time I got there — if I got there — I’d have to turn around and come straight back. I’ve paid for taxis and lost my holiday time. All I got is a long day in your waiting room. Either get me on a plane for San Diego now or give me my money back.”


I got the refund. Took a taxi home. Spent the long weekend feeling sorry for myself. I never made it San Diego, though I did see those friends a few years later — at least for a couple of hours. But, eventually, we lost touch. Distance only makes the heart grow fonder if there is a likelihood of ever seeing that person again. Otherwise, after a while, there seems no point in fighting to retain a connection.

Our fondest illusion is that we are in control. Architects of our destiny. That’s the promise we get from our parents while we are growing up. It goes hand in glove with the big lie, that if you do “life” right, you are sure to get what you want. All you have to do is keep trying. We know — because “they” told us — that good work will be rewarded. Kindness will be returned. If we eat right, keep fit, and exercise we’ll be healthy. Forever. Bad things won’t happen to us.

From the little stuff — flights cancelled, vacations rained out — to failed marriages and careers crashed, life strips us of illusions. But what’s left is real, solid, and true. Is that such a bad thing?

We are passengers on the bus that is life. We aren’t driving. We don’t even know what road we’re on, or our destination. Sometimes, it’s worth reconsidering your options. Stop trying to wrestle the steering wheel out of the driver’s hands. The bus is going where it’s going. Enjoy the ride.

Life is not about where you end up. It’s about the journey.