Let me get this straight.I am talking about reviews of things. Books, audiobooks, movies, television shows. I should include music, but I don’t real reviews of music and to be absolutely honest, I haven’t read anything about music, other than which classical pianist plays, oh I don’t know … Beethoven’s sonatas or Chopin’s nocturnes better than whoever else plays them … and that was 50 years ago. A child, was I back then.
These days, Garry usually reads the reviews and the ones he thinks I’d enjoy, he passes over to me.
The moment I see any of these words:
and others I can’t think of right now because I haven’t had enough coffee, I know I will not see that movie. Anyway, who really goes to the movies? If you aren’t a kid dating another kid, who actually watches the crud they are playing? My granddaughter won’t go either because she says the stories are “stupid” and she’s not quite 21. Ah from the mouths of babes.
All those words mean one thing.
Dull. Sometimes, really boring. Occasionally, merely “lacking anything resembling a plot.” I don’t care how many Hollywood, London, or Melbourne “Big Name Actors” are in it. As often as not, when you see a big crowd of expensive actors in one cast, you can put money on the lack of a decent script. They had to save money somewhere, you know.
When asked the three most important points of movie making, Alfred Hitchcock said: “The script, the script, and the script.”
Good acting counts, too — if there’s a script. As does excellent cinematography, set design, directing … all of it matters. When there’s a story.
If you don’t have a script, the rest of it is “nuanced nothing.” A sensitive, artistic, subtle yet somehow, poignant (and deeply touching) movie which will be admired by the artsy crowd. And forgotten by everyone else before six months has passed.
This is my very nuanced opinion on nuance. Shoot me dead, I do not care. If the script, the story, the characters, the follow through don’t work? Boring. Dull. You want to make everyone older than 14 go to the movies? Make movies that feel like life. Doesn’t have to be life right now. It can be life 500 years ago. Regardless, give us life.
Give us stories with a beginning, a middle, and an end. Give us a tale to tell our kids. Make that story rock!