DOOM, DESTRUCTION AND THE DNC – BY TOM CURLEY

I don’t know about anybody else but I usually spend about five minutes every day deleting the junk email from my account.

I’ve had an AOL account from literally when they first started. I briefly worked for them and got the account for free. Yes you had to pay for an email account back in those dark early days.

 I have other email accounts, but I like this one. I’ve had it for over 20 years. I know that if you have an AOL email account millennials think it’s funny and it means you’re old. Fuck you, you little bastards. I was using email before you were even gleam in your father’s eye.  And get off my lawn!

Most of my junk mail is from political organizations like the DNC, Move.on, People for the American way, Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, Michelle Obama’s cousin, etc. I’m sure the Republicans do the same thing. Blessedly, I don’t get those emails.

The ones I do get are incredibly annoying. They are always at def-con five. Or is it Def-con one? Whichever is worse, these are them. The world is always coming to an end.

Here are real subject lines from just three.


KISS ALL HOPE GOODBYE!

WE FELL SHORT!

THAT’S IT! IT’S OVER! TIME TO PACK UP AND GO!


The body of the emails will tell you that the Republicans have won. It’s over. We are all doomed. Everything we hold dear is gone.

DEAD!! NO HOPE!!

But when you get to the bottom of the email it says:


“However, it you could just chip in 3 dollars,
we could fix all this and the world would be fine again.”

Excuse me?? THREE DOLLARS??

You just had me freaking out about the end of all that I love and hold dear — and you could fix it for THREE FRIGGING DOLLARS!!!?

For God’s sake, take up an office pool! Dig up lost change  in the break room couch.

Tell me there’s not a few bucks in there.

All I’m saying is, tone it down guys.

God I wish spam filters actually worked.

23 thoughts on “DOOM, DESTRUCTION AND THE DNC – BY TOM CURLEY

  1. Marilyn Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 12:19 am

    In 2008, I chipped in three dollars to help elect Barack Obama. From that day to now, I am in the tube reserved for liberal fools who are expected to donate all their spare money to fund somebody’s political career. Periodically, I go through my tons of email and unsubscribe to everything.

    They come back. You would think i’d donated a small fortune for the volume of hysterical, frantic, frenzied emails announcing the destruction of everything and then some. Who knew those three dollars would be the most perilous investment I ever made? It is comforting to realize that I could be getting the same crazed emails even without donating anything.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Garry Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 12:37 pm

      Yo, Pancho!! Throttle back on them harsh words regards your AOL mail.

      I usually have about 100 plus 10 or 15 things when I open my gmail every day. Most of it relates to “Serendipity”. New posts and comments about recent posts. I also have stuff from “The New Yorker”, “In and Out”, casting call notes and some myriad other stuff. Now and then, I get requests from people to run for office or go back on television and slay the dragon. I offer brief and polite replies. I’m no longer Man of La Mancha.

      Pancho, I’m looking forward to our summer boat day visit. I assume you’ve already confirmed sunshine and warm temps. Gotta work on my tan.

      Hasta luego,
      Ceeeeeesco

      Liked by 1 person

      • tomcurley1 May 9, 2017 / 1:31 pm

        I’m still working on my trying to be a curmudgeon thing.

        Liked by 1 person

        • Garry Armstrong May 10, 2017 / 11:38 am

          A work in progress. JCK had it down pat.

          Like

  2. Alexis Chateau May 9, 2017 / 12:26 am

    Hmmm… My email address is public because of my business and I rarely get spam in the primary section of my email. That’s the only section I check.

    What I love about Gmail is that once I keep ignoring or deleting something, it filters it out for me.

    As far as the over reacting emails, I’ve never gotten any of those. Maybe I’m lucky, or maybe it’s because I stay away from political organizations.

    Politics in general leans to corruption. I try to focus my energies on causes instead.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Marilyn Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 12:39 am

      If you just go to a site to read something without signing up, they STILL grab your email address. Which is how come I get email from everybody everywhere. They are clever. No two addresses are exactly the same, so even if you unsubscribe, there are more. I resent they can grab my email address just because I stopped to read something, but the way they have laws set up these days, you can’t stop them. Reading is how I learn things. I’m not giving up reading, at least, not quite yet. Things will only become increasingly corrupt if we give up at least trying to pay attention. It’s the least we can do.

      Liked by 3 people

      • Alexis Chateau May 9, 2017 / 11:00 pm

        Hi Marilyn,

        I have never heard of such a thing. There are spam laws prohibiting companies from doing this.

        I automatically have the email address of everyone who follows and comments on my websites. I have 3! – and I never send promotional emails or add people to newsletters just for the heck of it. That’s so rude! It’s also ILLEGAL.

        Never had my email taken and used in that way, despite it being public, though. Maybe you should look into better browsing security, clearing your cookies, or possibly switching to Google. Google, from my experience, has an excellent spam blocker. I rarely get an email I don’t want/need to see.

        All the best!

        Like

        • Marilyn Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 11:22 pm

          Remember when — last month? earlier this month? — they changed the law so ISPs can use your private data any way they want? It was big news. This IS what it means. Basically, there are no laws about using your data. None. They have been removed. I can block people from this site and I do. And, I suppose, in theory, I could use the email data I get in some spammy way, but I would never do that. Then again, I’m not an ISP. I can’t prevent others from gathering my email as their data.

          If your email has not been gathered and reused, you are merely lucky. I haven’t been hacked, invaded, or stolen from. I’ve just been added to mailing lists. LOTS of them.

          I use gmail for ALL of my email. Their spam blocker is NOT that great. Sorry, but it isn’t. I’ve been using their email exclusively for more than a decade and it ain’t that great.

          Liked by 1 person

          • Alexis Chateau May 10, 2017 / 2:06 am

            I had forgotten about that new law. You are right about that. However, it still does violate international laws to spam people.

            As far as gmail, Google does you teach it to do. In order to improve the spam blocker, you must first teach Google what is spam. I use Gmail for business and my personal accounts. I get hundreds of emails per day – very little spam.

            I hope the spam gets better for you though. All the best!

            Like

            • Marilyn Armstrong May 10, 2017 / 2:10 am

              I do it too, but the political mail uses a slightly different address each time, so you really can’t block a bunch of them. You have to unsubscribe to each one.

              I’m not sure spamming IS illegal anymore, either.

              Liked by 1 person

  3. lwbut May 9, 2017 / 5:03 am

    The biggest question i have about your post is…

    … Does Yoda have TWO opposable thumbs??? 😉

    love.

    Liked by 3 people

    • tomcurley1 May 9, 2017 / 1:34 pm

      Wow. I never noticed that. I wonder if they cancel each other out and he can’t pick anything up. That’s why he’s always using the force to pick things up!

      Liked by 1 person

      • lwbut May 10, 2017 / 12:29 am

        Seen his feet too? – i think Yoda’s related to turtles!!! 🙂

        love.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. swo8 May 9, 2017 / 10:54 am

    Yup we get junk mail too and there’s a lot of the physical kind at the front door too.
    Leslie

    Liked by 1 person

    • Marilyn Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 11:56 am

      I get a lot less of the physical kind, though I think time has had its way with much of that. And I finally convinced places like Lands End to stop sending the catalog since I shop online anyway. Garry still likes the LL Bean catalog. He like turning pages and thinking about clothing.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Garry Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 12:43 pm

      Leslie, seems like most of our snail mail is junk or bills. I gotta admit I still like thumbing thru some of the
      LL Bean catalogues. I don’t need anything but like looking at the clothing. It’s like looking at the car ads in newspapers. I look but know we can’t afford.

      Liked by 1 person

      • swo8 May 9, 2017 / 1:25 pm

        I like looking through the adds so I don’t have to go shopping.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Martha Kennedy May 9, 2017 / 2:59 pm

    I agree — when I look at the communication coming into my email box and that coming out of the OTHER side of the political world I see the same basic thing. Seeds of fear and panic sown irresponsibly for monetary gain. I think I even told moveon.org to go fuck itself and quit asking for my money. Just because I signed one of their petitions, doesn’t mean I LIKE them.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Marilyn Armstrong May 9, 2017 / 3:48 pm

      They REALLY need to tone it down. The hysteria isn’t doing anyone any favors. I think it makes everything worse.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Martha Kennedy May 9, 2017 / 4:00 pm

        I agree completely. For one thing, it makes actual logical thought more difficult and godnose we need more of that.

        Liked by 1 person

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