Home › Government › DOOM, DESTRUCTION AND THE DNC – BY TOM CURLEY

DOOM, DESTRUCTION AND THE DNC – BY TOM CURLEY

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I don’t know about anybody else but I usually spend about five minutes every day deleting the junk email from my account.

I’ve had an AOL account from literally when they first started. I briefly worked for them and got the account for free. Yes you had to pay for an email account back in those dark early days.

 I have other email accounts, but I like this one. I’ve had it for over 20 years. I know that if you have an AOL email account millennials think it’s funny and it means you’re old. Fuck you, you little bastards. I was using email before you were even gleam in your father’s eye.  And get off my lawn!

Most of my junk mail is from political organizations like the DNC, Move.on, People for the American way, Barack Obama, Michelle Obama, Michelle Obama’s cousin, etc. I’m sure the Republicans do the same thing. Blessedly, I don’t get those emails.

The ones I do get are incredibly annoying. They are always at def-con five. Or is it Def-con one? Whichever is worse, these are them. The world is always coming to an end.

Here are real subject lines from just three.

KISS ALL HOPE GOODBYE!

WE FELL SHORT!

THAT’S IT! IT’S OVER! TIME TO PACK UP AND GO!

The body of the emails will tell you that the Republicans have won. It’s over. We are all doomed. Everything we hold dear is gone.

DEAD!! NO HOPE!!

But when you get to the bottom of the email it says:

“However, it you could just chip in 3 dollars,
we could fix all this and the world would be fine again.”

Excuse me?? THREE DOLLARS??

You just had me freaking out about the end of all that I love and hold dear — and you could fix it for THREE FRIGGING DOLLARS!!!?

For God’s sake, take up an office pool! Dig up lost change  in the break room couch.

Tell me there’s not a few bucks in there.

All I’m saying is, tone it down guys.

God I wish spam filters actually worked.

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Categories: Government, Humor, Politics, Tom Curley

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23 replies

  1. Martha Kennedy
    05/09/2017 • 14:59

    I agree — when I look at the communication coming into my email box and that coming out of the OTHER side of the political world I see the same basic thing. Seeds of fear and panic sown irresponsibly for monetary gain. I think I even told moveon.org to go fuck itself and quit asking for my money. Just because I signed one of their petitions, doesn’t mean I LIKE them.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. swo8
    05/09/2017 • 10:54

    Yup we get junk mail too and there’s a lot of the physical kind at the front door too.
    Leslie

    Liked by 1 person

  3. lwbut
    05/09/2017 • 05:03

    The biggest question i have about your post is…

    … Does Yoda have TWO opposable thumbs??? 😉

    love.

    Liked by 3 people

  4. Alexis Chateau
    05/09/2017 • 00:26

    Hmmm… My email address is public because of my business and I rarely get spam in the primary section of my email. That’s the only section I check.

    What I love about Gmail is that once I keep ignoring or deleting something, it filters it out for me.

    As far as the over reacting emails, I’ve never gotten any of those. Maybe I’m lucky, or maybe it’s because I stay away from political organizations.

    Politics in general leans to corruption. I try to focus my energies on causes instead.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Marilyn Armstrong
      05/09/2017 • 00:39

      If you just go to a site to read something without signing up, they STILL grab your email address. Which is how come I get email from everybody everywhere. They are clever. No two addresses are exactly the same, so even if you unsubscribe, there are more. I resent they can grab my email address just because I stopped to read something, but the way they have laws set up these days, you can’t stop them. Reading is how I learn things. I’m not giving up reading, at least, not quite yet. Things will only become increasingly corrupt if we give up at least trying to pay attention. It’s the least we can do.

      Liked by 3 people

      • Alexis Chateau
        05/09/2017 • 23:00

        Hi Marilyn,

        I have never heard of such a thing. There are spam laws prohibiting companies from doing this.

        I automatically have the email address of everyone who follows and comments on my websites. I have 3! – and I never send promotional emails or add people to newsletters just for the heck of it. That’s so rude! It’s also ILLEGAL.

        Never had my email taken and used in that way, despite it being public, though. Maybe you should look into better browsing security, clearing your cookies, or possibly switching to Google. Google, from my experience, has an excellent spam blocker. I rarely get an email I don’t want/need to see.

        All the best!

        Like

        • Marilyn Armstrong
          05/09/2017 • 23:22

          Remember when — last month? earlier this month? — they changed the law so ISPs can use your private data any way they want? It was big news. This IS what it means. Basically, there are no laws about using your data. None. They have been removed. I can block people from this site and I do. And, I suppose, in theory, I could use the email data I get in some spammy way, but I would never do that. Then again, I’m not an ISP. I can’t prevent others from gathering my email as their data.

          If your email has not been gathered and reused, you are merely lucky. I haven’t been hacked, invaded, or stolen from. I’ve just been added to mailing lists. LOTS of them.

          I use gmail for ALL of my email. Their spam blocker is NOT that great. Sorry, but it isn’t. I’ve been using their email exclusively for more than a decade and it ain’t that great.

          Liked by 1 person

          • Alexis Chateau
            05/10/2017 • 02:06

            I had forgotten about that new law. You are right about that. However, it still does violate international laws to spam people.

            As far as gmail, Google does you teach it to do. In order to improve the spam blocker, you must first teach Google what is spam. I use Gmail for business and my personal accounts. I get hundreds of emails per day – very little spam.

            I hope the spam gets better for you though. All the best!

            Like

            • Marilyn Armstrong
              05/10/2017 • 02:10

              I do it too, but the political mail uses a slightly different address each time, so you really can’t block a bunch of them. You have to unsubscribe to each one.

              I’m not sure spamming IS illegal anymore, either.

              Liked by 1 person

  5. Marilyn Armstrong
    05/09/2017 • 00:19

    In 2008, I chipped in three dollars to help elect Barack Obama. From that day to now, I am in the tube reserved for liberal fools who are expected to donate all their spare money to fund somebody’s political career. Periodically, I go through my tons of email and unsubscribe to everything.

    They come back. You would think i’d donated a small fortune for the volume of hysterical, frantic, frenzied emails announcing the destruction of everything and then some. Who knew those three dollars would be the most perilous investment I ever made? It is comforting to realize that I could be getting the same crazed emails even without donating anything.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Garry Armstrong
      05/09/2017 • 12:37

      Yo, Pancho!! Throttle back on them harsh words regards your AOL mail.

      I usually have about 100 plus 10 or 15 things when I open my gmail every day. Most of it relates to “Serendipity”. New posts and comments about recent posts. I also have stuff from “The New Yorker”, “In and Out”, casting call notes and some myriad other stuff. Now and then, I get requests from people to run for office or go back on television and slay the dragon. I offer brief and polite replies. I’m no longer Man of La Mancha.

      Pancho, I’m looking forward to our summer boat day visit. I assume you’ve already confirmed sunshine and warm temps. Gotta work on my tan.

      Hasta luego,
      Ceeeeeesco

      Liked by 1 person