On June 11, 2017, the front page of the New York Times ‘Sunday Styles’ section had an article called “An Anxious Nation.” The article talks about the near epidemic levels of anxiety in our society. For a generation, depression was the poster child for mental illness/psychological malaise.


I have both depression and anxiety disorders. My life changed when the first mass market anti-depressant drug, Prozac, became available to the public. It does wonders for me and alleviates my anxiety based depression. Because of Prozac and other drugs in the same category, I have been able to control my symptoms. I have become a happier, calmer, more upbeat person. My inner life now is positive more often than negative.

But, I’ve always felt ‘different’. There was something about me that most people couldn’t understand or relate to. I learned to edit out my anxious and/or depressive thoughts when talking to people. I didn’t admit many of my fears or worries. I just made myself do what I thought was considered ‘normal’ in a given situation.

I felt great relief when depression came out of the closet, so to speak. A lot was written about it and it became universally recognized and better understood. I didn’t have to anticipate the question “what are you depressed about?” if I told someone I was depressive. Over the years of mainstream depression education, most people ‘get’ that it is an illness in which irrationality can control the sufferer. They can understand and empathize, at least on a superficial, outsider level.

Donald Trump has helped push this condition into the mainstream. Since he’s been President, therapists all over the country are reporting a large increase in the number of people coming in with some form of anxiety! Now it looks like anxiety will have its day in the spotlight. A lot is being written about it and an avalanche of people are admitting that they are afflicted by it.

I feel freer now to be open about my issues, however minor they may be for me nowadays. Now I can tell people that I have serious anxieties about driving to an airport alone. This used to be one of my embarrassing secrets. That kind of anxiety is ‘out there’ today. It’s all over TV sitcoms, other TV shows and movies. Celebrities have talked about having agoraphobia. So now I can admit that I have days when I feel anxious about leaving the house. I can reasonably expect some empathy and understanding of my irrational feelings.

Hopefully more people are recognizing and diagnosing their anxieties and getting help. Medication does a lot for most people, as does Cognitive Therapy. More support groups are popping up online and in the real world. Being able to talk openly and feel support is a big step towards conquering the illness.

It is liberating to know that I am not alone battling my demons. It is comforting to know that many other people have similar issues. Why does that help me? Because the painful sense of stigma is removed. No one, including me, believes it’s my ‘fault’.

The need for secrecy and pretending is removed. I can just deal with my issues in peace. I don’t have to add insult to injury. I don’t have to be anxious about my anxiety!

Categories: Ellin Curley, Health, Humor, Mental health, Personal

Tags: , , , , , ,

10 replies

  1. I find that when one person decides to open up and say, “I have anxiety/depression and I take this,” then others feel like it’s ok to say it as well. There is a strength in numbers. I agree, medicine is very helpful. SSRI’s are the only reason I do function normally with anxiety. Thanks for this! 🙂


  2. True. Talking out is the first step, be it family, friends or the doc. The issue is that everyone talks so everybody takes it lightly like the common cold or a normal anxiety headache case. It’s the awareness to understand, decipher & reach out to the real ones who silently convey the call for help. These are the people who seem extremely normal but one small issue like sudden forgetfulness, a falling grade in a child’s favourite subject, unkept hair, sudden bouts of insomnia, hunger etc, which are usually ignored to taken as loud signs worth reaching out to be helped.


  3. Ellin, I’m sure as you say, there are many more people experiencing anxiety today. I used to be able to drive all over and now the thought of driving is very anxiety producing. The level of traffic has reach a level that few people are able to deal with. I’m glad you have found measures that work for you. Me – I’ll try to stay off the roads as much as possible.


    • You make a good point, Leslie. There’s so much more in everyday life now that causes or exacerbates anxiety. Traffic, crowds, rude people, things that don’t work the way they’re supposed to, incompetence, etc. Tom has been fighting recently with his union, Direct TV, UPS and the Post Office, to name a few. He is now living on a hair trigger!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Ellin, I think MacCheesehead 45 has opened the closet door for many people. I still internalize a lot of my negative thoughts. Like Tom, I covered decades of the political scum of the earth.. I’m not immune. My anger simmers. After all those years of face to face encounters with corrupt pols, dirtbag criminals and wacko killers, I can’t really laugh with the comics or rant with the public. I’m the quiet guy with the strange smile.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Anger and negative thoughts are not the same thing as depression or anxiety. Those are chemical processes in the brain that affect the way you see and react to things around you.They create irrational behavior and emotions that can’t be controlled easily. You’re lucky if most of your negativity and anger comes from the outside world, which is full of it. But I can’t imagine all you’ve seen and heard that must make your blood boil. It must be hard to keep a positive attitude in every day life.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Well expressed. Depression is a topic almost everyone avoid talking about. Seldom take help to overcome. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m finding that more people are talking about mental issues these days. Maybe that’s because so many more people are affected by mental illness in some way. Hopefully people can at least talk to close friends and family even if they don’t want to get professional help.


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