I remember those bad old days. When contraception wasn’t great and no matter how hard you tried, you might end up pregnant anyway. We fought a lonely battle to retain control over our own bodies. We won. I was sure we won, didn’t we? Because Roe V. Wade put an end to finding abortion in a back room somewhere.
I remember the days of backroom abortions performed with chlorine bleach, coat hangers and turkey basters. When sepsis or perforation of your uterus was not an unusual price to pay to end a pregnancy. Where young women, unable to obtain an abortion threw themselves off bridges rather than have an unwanted baby, or tried to abort themselves, often with lethal results.
Despite conservative backlash and brainwashing on this issue, having an abortion was not and is not a sign one is irresponsible or anti-life.
Women have abortions for all kinds of reasons, including a desire to be more than a mother, physical health, welfare of existing children, and simple desire to survive. Meanwhile, men are trying to stop a woman’s access to abortion are equally determined to keep the same women from getting effective birth control.
So if too many feminists are “anti-man,” how many of these men are blatantly anti-woman? Maybe all of them? If there is any other possible logic to men who want women to not abort also making sure they are bound to get pregnant, tell me what it is.
What’s the real point? I don’t think it has anything to do with life or with living a better life. It’s about power and putting women back in their place so these old white men can take back the control they’ve lost. Back to the kitchen for us, barefoot and pregnant.
If men had babies, this would not be happening.
So many women my age went through an abortion or something very close to it. Were we happy about it? No, but we weighed our options, talked it over with friends, family, counselors, ministers … and then did what we felt was best, not just for us but for everyone. Life doesn’t happen in a vacuum. We were adult women. We had the right and the obligation to decide what happens to our bodies and our lives.
I maintain my long-standing position on this matter: if you are not in personal possession of a vagina and/or a uterus, your opinion is unwelcome. I do not care what you believe. Until you walk in my shoes and live in my body, you know nothing.
Why am I weighing in on this?
The most significant gains in personal freedom women have won are at risk. If we don’t speak up, speak out, and stand together, we will lose it. All of it.
I am many years past child-bearing age. This isn’t about me, my friends, or my life. It’s about women. All women. Here and everywhere. About whether or not we have the right to decide what happens to us. If there is a right to life involved, how about the right of women to have a good life, to bear the number of children we want from none to whatever.
I want all woman to not be managed by men whose stake in the matter is tangential. At best. How about that?
No one wants an abortion, but sometimes, you need one.