THE MORNING AFTER THE FIFTEEN … OY … TEN COMMANDMENTS …

Ten is hard enough. Another five? Oy.

Today was the day. Our annual, ritual watching of “The Ten Commandments.” It’s not that we love the movie. More like it has become a bit of a joke, but also a ritual. Listening and smiling at the narration of Cecile B. DeMille. The incredibly stilted dialogue … ah, Moses, Moses …

Evening … time for the show to begin …

We readied ourselves for The Experience. Evening had arrived. The light outside was fading. Garry popped in the DVD and it said “Overture.” But when Cecile B. DeMille showed up on-screen, we didn’t see any captions. Uh oh. Can’t watch without captions!

Overture … but no captions!

Garry thought he had set the captions, but now Cecile was telling us about the movie and he wasn’t captioned. I turned the movie off and tried to restart it. It wouldn’t restart. We finally rebooted the machine and … it started. I set the captions.

Duke’s ready too!

Every movie that includes captions (some still don’t) does it a different way. You may find captions under “Languages,” “Settings,” “Subtitles,” or something else. Exactly how you set them is also entirely whimsical.

Garry checks to make sure he’s got the right disc.
A critical moment as (unbeknownst to Moses) his mother is about to become grease to Ramses stones.

We had trouble getting the second disc in, too. We’ve been debating whether or not to get a new DVD player. Maybe we need one. This one is getting really touchy. About everything.

Finally, I got up and jiggled the DVD around until it decided it had found its home and the movie … slowly, slowly, slowly … began. Phew.

We’d sure have hated to miss the angel of death and those forty years of walking around the Sinai.

Everything’s in place.

Here is where the really holy part begins.

Note Garry’s feet as he watches God freeing his wife’s people. Woo hoo!

A happy Easter to all who celebrate. Many bright eggs to all who collect … and don’t overdo it on the matzoh!

Or, as Garry put it …

So let it be written. So let it be done!

Author: Marilyn Armstrong

Writer, photography, blogger. Previously, technical writer. Retired! Yay!

33 thoughts on “THE MORNING AFTER THE FIFTEEN … OY … TEN COMMANDMENTS …”

    1. Yes, but you don’t get the rising of the pyramids and the storms on Mt. Sinai and everyone saying “OH MOSES, MOSES!” and those stupid Jews building a big golden cow. No gore, no hammer, no nails, no hanging bodies on crosses. Phew. Just a lot of drowning Egyptians in the Red Seas or Sea of Reeds, take your pick.

      Liked by 1 person

        1. One of the few things I actually LIKE about those 10 commandments is the lack of violence. We have tuned out of a lot of shows recently because they were too much for both of us. Neither of us likes gore and we won’t watch anything where an animal gets hurt. It’s limiting, especially since gore is quite the rage these days.

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          1. I know. I can’t stand it, either.. Or bullying! I don’t think I’ve ever seen The Ten Commandments, actually. But I just now watched Charleton Heston on Friends! Really! What are the chances? We’re on the same track again.

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  1. Easter seems to be the time to catch up on the old films. Yesterday I saw five minutes of a film where about 100 half naked men were all rowing a boat together. Mr. Swiss switched changed the channel but said it was a sandal film with Charlton Heston, another one I missed. Happy whatever and enjoy the days of nothing and films.

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  2. Last religious movie I was was when I was about 7, “The Robe” had been produced and every Catholic in the country was exhorted from the pulpit to see it. Not exactly child-friendly, and by the time they got through with the hammers and the nails I was totally traumatized.
    It was my first and last adventure with Hollywood’s idea of religious movies. I’ve seen bits and pieces over time of most of them, all over acted, over dramatized, over hyped.

    I admire your devotion to this one.

    I think if I had a DVD I’d be watching Scrooge…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I draw the line at “The Ten Commandments.” No blood, no gore, no hammer, no nails, no “The Jews killed Jesus” because these ARE the Jews and they aren’t killing anyone but themselves. I totally refuse all the others. But this one is so totally tacky and fake — especially the parting of those waters which is the very first SERIOUS Hollywood special effect — well … And then there’s Lucky Chucky Heston. Actually, I am also a fan of the chariot races on Ben Hur. That was the real deal with real horse and chariots and the stunt guy got killed doing it. You can see him mangled under the chariot.

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    1. I think that’s pretty much the movie. That and the fact that EVERYONE says Moses twice. “Oh, MOSES, MOSES …” It’s a thing. You can’t say Moses once, apparently. Also, Garry is beginning to think those Jews were about as loyal as Red Sox fans. Not.

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      1. I’m sure Teddy is not short of attention from the two of you although i expect attention from the other members of your household might be more than he could ‘bear’ 😀

        A Teddy hug from me and Little Ted…
        ((HUG)) (hug) ❤ 🙂

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  3. I skipped the ritual watching of it this year for NCAA basketball (Loyola), dinner and PBS (Father Brown and Death in Paradise). I have seen it more times than I can count anyway, and since it is a DeMille epic, it is LONG. I’ll catch it next year.

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    1. I know. You can recite every stupid word he said. On the net, you can see a really hilarious take down of this from SNL with Charlton Heston playing Charlton Heston. Pretty funny. I posted it yesterday on my feed. But EVERYONE has done a takedown on this one.

      Liked by 1 person

    1. And they were, remember, walking in circles. Because taking the LONG WAY through the middle of the desert, it’s a six day and 5 hour walk — and probably half that if you travel along the shoreline (which is much prettier and the beaches are perfection).

      40 years in the desert next to Phoenix, but you never get to Phoenix?

      Liked by 2 people

  4. You have The Ten Commandments, I have Jesus Christ Superstar. “What’s the buzz? Tell me what’s a-happening?…” ^_^

    I also like that bit from History of the World by Mel Brooks. History of the World used to be one of my favorite movies.

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