DOGS GONE BAD – ACCOMPLICES OR PERPS? – Garry Armstrong

FOWC with Fandango — Accomplice

You could never tell with those furry furies. Who was the doer and who was the do-ee?  From 2015, it’s “Dogs Gone Bad” by Garry Armstrong.


Marilyn and I follow lots of those TV procedural crime shows. We anticipate all the cliché lines.

“Stay in the car”

“He was turning his life around.”

“Everyone loved him.”

“No one was supposed to get hurt!”

72-Bishop-Portrait-122415_15

We usually figure out who the “vics” and “perps” are before the coppers and lawyers find the answer, often before the credits finish rolling. Now, fiction has turned to cold, hard reality in our home. We are the victims. Not the mob, not the cabal, not even some local mokes looking for an easy score.

It’s an inside job and the perps are our DOGS!

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They’ll smile, offer constant affection and cheer us up when we aren’t feeling good. But it’s part of their sting.

Food is the motive. Their “jackets” are full of priors. Most are misdemeanors but now they’ve moved up the chain to a felony. Bonnie, our beloved Scottie, is the boss. She leads the furry gang in snatches, intimidation, assault (head butting), larceny and perjury.

Amber

We’ve tried to turn their lives around with extra Christmas goodies, more fun battles on the love seat and long chats to emphasize our affection.

But Bonnie and her accomplices are food-driven. Nothing we do can stop this furry reign of terror. We don’t want to profile Bonnie because she is black, and we are afraid of possible lawsuits. Perhaps the IA people can check out her background.

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Bonnie, clearly driven to revenge, is hell-bent on retribution because … we’ve put her on a diet. Bonnie is relentless in stealing Marilyn’s food. She stalks Marilyn and refuses to back down when confronted. The other dogs make sure Bonnie’s six is protected.

We’ve tried so hard to show them the path to a good life but their crimes are senseless.

Generosity… That was our first mistake.

27 thoughts on “DOGS GONE BAD – ACCOMPLICES OR PERPS? – Garry Armstrong”

      1. Hell, Book ’em all. Use Interrogation Room #1. These perps are all the same. Recidivists all. Gotta draw line in sand. They’re looking at lots of time in the Big House. NO LAWYERS!

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    1. “Puppy Dog Eyes” — look at her rap sheet. Bad to the bone, Pilgrim.

      Gotta have law ‘n order …or the dogs will take over.

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  1. One of our cats passed over about a week ago. Little Tammy had been sick for a long, long time. Rose spent a ton on vet bills and meds trying to heal her. It only prolonged the inevitable. Yet she seemed content most of the time. Finally, she stopped eating. It was time to go.
    A few days after she passed however, she came back to say Thanks and Goodbye. She jumped on the bed and nestled up beside my head and purred. Inwardly I stroked her. And Thanked her for her Love and Companionship. Sweet Soul.
    Somewhere, sometime, up the trail, I hope to see her again.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Ooh – my heart is hurting. I so love them dachsies…. I always said of mine: She (can / might have) has a terrible character, but at least she HAS character. Nothing worse than anybody/anything ‘just going along’ and never uttering an opinion. That little goddess of mine had more life and personality in her little beautiful head than many adults I met in my life!
        Cancer seems to affect everybody…. It hasn’t been in our pets but in the humans of my family and dearest. Which of course is even worse.
        When is your sweet man’s operation? I thought it was all done with but haven’t heard anything or maybe just didn’t understand half of it.

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  2. lmao omg I needed that! Absolutely LOVED it. I too am a nut for who done its. I love them and I usually figure it out within 10 minutes which drives my kids wild (always has) but hey it’s a gift, right?! smirk smirk. But it takes it to a whole new level when it’s in home! hahahaha Love it Garry!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. 20 years ago, when Jules and
    Lucy joined the household, we had all these resolutions. No cats on the table, only cat food, etc. lasted a few minutes. Now meal planning is done including what will work for her Excellency. Bonnie has friends. Could use some of the RICO statutes in your prosecution, although in the best spy tradition, the evidence no longer exists. Burrrrp said the perp.

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    1. They all get a little something. And they KNOW they will get something, either from the dinner or their own dessert. These are pretty beefy little dogs, so no matter how often they assure me they are STARVING, somewhere in my heart, I know they are not. So how come they always get what they want? Even though I know better?

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