I have a thing that occasionally happens to me which is sort of like a seizure but isn’t. It happens once in a while — like every year — but it remains a medical mystery. I do know how to deal with it which is to hit the ground and stay there until the world stops spinning. If I do this, two things won’t happen. I won’t faint and I won’t walk into a wall or door. It doesn’t happen often, but it can be alarming.
After I arose from the floor — and after asking me if I was okay — Garry decided I was okay because I said so. He went to the bedroom to watch an old movie or two. Then I had another little flip. It was late. I was tired. After things stopped spinning, I turned the television off and toddled off to the bedroom
Garry: “Are you okay?”
Me: “My brain is weird.”
Garry: “What? I don’t have my hearing aids on.” I look at him for a while, so he got out of bed and puts on a hearing aid. I tell him I just got another spin and I think I need to lie down and go to sleep. It was a long day. He asks me if he can do anything for me. He wants to help, so I let him.
Me: “Could you get me a coke?”
Garry, relieved I’ve finally given him a task, gets ready to go to the kitchen. While he’s at it, he realizes I’ve got today’s clothing on the floor near the bed, so he asks me if I want it washed, Sunday being laundry day.
Me: “Sure. Great idea. Thanks for offering.”
Garry: “Is there anything in your pockets?”
Me: “No pockets.”
Garry: Looks at pants and says: “Oh, you don’t have any pockets.” We have had many versions of this conversation, about why women’s pants don’t have pockets (to make your hips look smoother), but men’s do. It’s a fashion thing, but pockets are useful.
Me: “Yes. There’s nothing in my pockets.”
Garry: “What? You’re talking very softly. Oh, right, I’m only wearing one hearing aid. The cochlear one isn’t in.”
I couldn’t stop laughing. My hearing isn’t what it used to be and Duke was making loud doggy yawning noises. I think our conversation was keeping him awake. I couldn’t stop laughing. It was a classic old people conversation. Maybe you had to be there.