After a summer of rainy, steamy, hot, and mosquito-riddled months, it’s September.

The temperature is more or less normal. Nice. Cool, sunny, dry — and the leaves are thinking about changing color.


Do you believe in soul-mates?  (Melanie’s definition of ‘soul mate’ is the IDEAL partner romantically).

Romantic is all well and good, but marriage isn’t a romance. It’s a very long term — possibly permanent — engagement in which both individual’s patience, sense of humor, joy, sorry, and ability to be there when things are not going well, romantically or otherwise — are fully tested.

Romance and the lovely fog of deliciousness that comes with romantic love is wonderful. But come children, exhaustion, two working adults and kids in child care whose own needs will soon catch up to yours — illnesses, broken cars, lost jobs, poverty, recovery, having to support other family members, dealing with the endless tasks of maintaining a home and car — and daily cooking, cleaning, trying to have a semblance of social life and still make it to work on time the next day? The romance has a funny way of fizzling. By the time you and your soul-mate fall into bed, no one has the energy for love-making.

A soul-mate is the one who hangs in there with you. Who has your back, no matter what. Who is in there rooting for you in good and not-so-good times. Who will push you to see a doctor when you don’t want to go. Who can make you laugh when laughing makes your stiches hurt. Who takes over the things you can’t do anymore as time takes its toll.

The one who doesn’t hold a grudge — even when he or she loses the fight — and doesn’t even remember why you were fighting an hour later (and worse, neither do you).

This is the person you want next to you when your life is on the line — or vice versa. A soul-mate cares for and about you when you are young and when you grow old.

What are three scents you like?

Vanilla, lemon, lavender.

What are some things that you might be considered too old to do, but that you enjoy?

Play Monopoly. I always get the Scottie dog!

What is one food you absolutely refuse to share?

I pretty much share everything. Although sometimes, I make him get his own because they are small. It’s not sharing if you co-opt your partner’s sushi.


Gratitude is what you should feel for those who were there for you when you most needed someone to be there. Who — without question — helped you when you were down and celebrated with you when you were up.

Gratitude should be what you feel when you are alive despite all odds and others you loved should be, but aren’t.

I’m pretty sure the love and gratitude are the same, just expressed a little differently.

Categories: #SYW, Anecdote, Holidays, Love, Relationships, Share My World

Tags: , , ,

8 replies

  1. Thanks, Marilyn, for Sharing Your World! You’ve given the perfect description of ‘soul mate’, dear. All that you wrote is true, the tricky part (for me anyway) was picking someone who had those long-term attributes. Harder still was having them myself. I think you and Garry are a beautiful love story. It’s obvious that you care and care deeply for and about one another. Wonderful example for those of us who have soured a bit. Sushi can be tricky. Utah, being landlocked, probably doesn’t get ‘authentic’ sushi (well my brother who was in Japan for two years says not and I believe him) but there are one or two really top quality Japanese restaurants in Salt Lake where you can make a meal out of just sushi and green tea. Wonderful! Beautiful thoughts on gratitude and love too! Have a great week and enjoy the Autumn. Hopefully you’ll get your color burst this year and be able to take some photos so those of us without the color burst (the leaves change, but they mostly turn a uniform beige it seems) can share the vision!


  2. Looks like you had a great outing.


  3. Beautiful answers Marilyn. Your description of soulmate is spot on, if one is lucky to find them.




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