I am not sure I’ve ever made a sincere New Year’s resolution. I can’t even remember making an insincere New Year’s resolution. This is one of those things I don’t do. Add it to “the bucket list” I don’t have.
First, at our age, the likelihood is very high that if I made a resolution today, I would forget it before tomorrow night unless I write it somewhere — like here or on the whiteboard on the refrigerator. I don’t remember anything for more than half a minute. If it was really important, I’ll eventually remember it, but if I don’t do whatever it requires immediately, I’ll forget it and move on. You have no idea how glad I am for automatic payments from the bank to just about everyone.
Ones mind is a terrible thing to waste, but mine has wandered far, far afield and will probably never come back.
Now, what was I writing about? Oh, right. Resolutions. Having a resolution would require resolve and I’m very low on resolve. Even things like vacation plans or events to which I’ve had to buy tickets may or may not really happen because I don’t care enough to get wildly excited about any of it. I’m more excited about books I want to read than most events.
This year, I do have an itty bitty plan to learn to draw. It’s an online course, so I might really do it. Besides, I already bought watercolor pencils, paper, erasers and other stuff. I really want to use them. It’s not a resolution because if I don’t do it, I won’t have to kill myself over my failure. It’s also possible I’ll forget what I was planning to do before January is over. These days, I sometimes forget what I’m doing while I’m doing it.
I’m not going to share my resolutions as I have none. I don’t have any. I’ve had plans and occasionally done what I planned, but I was younger and still had a bit of ambition remaining. Now? Planning ahead seems silly. Staying alive is as far as I go.
For those of you who have made resolutions? Good luck and may everything work out exactly as you intend. I don’t know anyone who has made a New Year’s resolution who actually did whatever it was, so be kind to yourself. If it doesn’t happen, that’s okay. Just keep breathing.
Maybe no one has sufficient resolve to make those resolutions stick?