Fandango’s Flashback Friday — May 19th

It is four years old and could have been written yesterday. Amazing, isn’t it?

One of the iconic scenes in the movie Star Wars, the first one. Episode 4. “A New Hope” is where Obi-Wan Kanobi is taking Luke Skywalker and his two droids R2D2 and C3PO into town and they are stopped by two Stormtroopers looking for those very two droids. Obi-Wan simply waves his hand and says “these are not the droids you are looking for. You can move along.” And  the Storm Trooper looks at him and says “these are not the droids we are looking for, you can move along.”

Obi-Wan then explains to Luke that it was a “Jedi Mind Trick.” But it only works on the weak and feeble minded. In other words, it only works on stupid people.

That means that the Jedi Mind Trick will work on Americans really well because this country has an absolutely amazing number of mind-numbingly stupid people. I bring this up because I read a result from a poll last week that said (and I am not making this up) that 56% of Americans believe that we should not teach or use Arabic numerals.

Let that sink in for a moment. 56% of the American public doesn’t know that 123456789 are Arabic numerals!!! That’s serious Storm  Trooper stupid.

Here’s some other “facts”:

Only two out of five of us can identify the three branches of government;

Less than half of us know which nation dropped the atomic bomb;

Only one-third of us know that the Congress, not the President, declares war;

Only 30% of us know that members of the House of Representatives serve two-year terms and only 25% of us know that Senators serve six-year terms;

Most Americans continue to believe that the 9/11 terrorists came from poverty or were neglected as children despite overwhelming evidence to the contrary;

A generation ago presidential speeches were pitched at the level of twelfth graders. Today they are pitched at the level of seventh graders;

Even after the 9/11 Commission had stated publicly that Saddam Hussein had provided no support to Al Qaeda, a poll showed that half the population still insisted that he had;

Only 25% of us can name more than one of the five freedoms guaranteed by the First Amendment but more than 50% of us can name two members of the Simpson family.

These revelations and many others come from Rick Shenkman, an Emmy Award-winning reporter and historian, in his new book entitled Just How Stupid Are We? Facing the Truth About the American Voter. The vaunted wisdom of the American people, Shenkman says, is a myth. When it comes to government and politics, we are ignoramuses: ill-informed, apathetic, and easily manipulated.”

Think about it. The Attorney General of the United States took Robert Mueller’s 400 plus page report that he didn’t even bother to read and just told the American public, “There’s nothing to see here, these aren’t the droids you are looking for. Move along.”

Almost half the country actually believes it! One Republican Congressman, ONE — actually read the report. And what did he do after he read it? He said that the President needs to be impeached! Because he broke the law!

“These are the Droids you are looking for! Arrest them!”

And then there’s Florida. America’s Dick. America’s big dumb dick. As any male knows, even if he won’t admit it, that when there is a competition between the “big brain” and the “little brain” the “little brain” always wins. For “Florida Man” (yes that’s a real thing, Google it) there is no competition.

Here’s a quick sample. All of the following are real and true:

“Florida Man attacked during selfie with a squirrel.

“Florida Man wearing tee-shirt that says ‘Who Needs Drugs? No seriously, I have drugs” is arrested for drug possession.”

“Florida Man charged with assault with a deadly weapon after throwing alligator through a Wendy’s Drive-in window.”

“Florida cop claims Burger King put dirt in his food – investigation reveals it was seasoning.”

“Thousands of gun owners in Florida planning to ‘shoot down’ Hurricane Irma.”

“Florida Man tries to rob a Game-Stop while wearing a transparent bag on his head.”

Finally, “Florida Man who tried to ‘run’ to Bermuda in inflatable bubble rescued by Coast Guard, AGAIN.”

And then there’s the number one, all-time greatest, bestest, bigly-brained Florida Man of them all.

We could really use Obi-Wan right about now.

Not the end.

Categories: Politics, Humor, Tom Curley, stupidity, Lies - lying - liars, political humor

Tags: , , , ,

33 replies

  1. Except now we don’t EVEN after we’ve tried everything else.


  2. I made this post into an episode of my podcast Get Off My Lawn!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Instead of being run by educators, many local school boards are run by people who obviously did not pay attention in schools. Until there are national standards, we will continue to have poorly educated masses dragging down the progress of the nation.

    Liked by 2 people

    • I don’t think blaming the schools is the answer, either. Yes, the schools are bad and getting worse — MUCH worse — but I didn’t learn much beyond reading, writing, and simple arithmetic in school, though I had a couple of brilliant Ph.D. teachers in high school who were the light of my mental life — and I learned a lot in college, though not necessarily in the classroom.

      I don’t think anyone could have stopped me from learning. Also, I came from a home — as did Garry — where we were surrounded by books, encouraged — STRONGLY encouraged — to read. I remember my mother not disturbing me to do some other chore if she saw I was reading because reading was so important.

      It helps to be bright, but it also helps to come from a home where learning is admired and encouraged — and this is far from true. And then there are all the kids who managed to learn in spite of their parents.

      Liked by 2 people

      • Among the tidbits in our home library (Lye-berry?) in my youth, “Not So Wild A Dream”. Author: Eric Sevareid. Now, I knew who he was because we listened to the “CBS News World Roundup” – every morning and evening — on the RADIO. Sevareid’s gravelly voice was as familiar as Jack Benny on “the wireless”. His memoir, I admit, left young Garry a bit hazy but I read the whole thing.

        Decades later, older Garry met Mr. Sevareid and recounted reading his memoir as an adolescent. The crusty journalist broke into a wide smile. “Did you understand it?”, he asked. “Not all of it”, I admitted but I added how much I understood from the other books in our home library and the CBS news COMMENTARIES that I enjoyed. News programs that forged my future profession. Sevareid, still smiling, said, “Well. I’ll be damned. That’s the best review of that old thing I’ve ever received. I was young and full of righteous anger when I wrote that thing”. I would meet Sevareid several times later and he was always very pleasant. Very unusual, according to his colleagues. Apparently Eric Sevareid, a colleague of the legendary Ed Murrow, thought that I – admittedly a very small snapshot consensus, represented hope in a nation of stupid people.

        That is a long winded anecdote, thanking my parents for making all those books available to feed my brain.

        Note” “Not So Wild A Dream” was published in 1941.


  4. As an outsider I don’t want to be the one to say that many Americans are just plain stupid but it is becoming more and more noticeable. You can’t ignore it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • There are a lot of parents who discourage education, directly or more subtly and I think they probably outnumber families where learning is encouraged. Some of us were bright enough to learn regardless, but there are far FAR too many parents who not having learned anything, sneer at those who did. I don’t understand that attitude. In my home, in Garry’s home, education was revered. Educated people were admired and we were encouraged to BE like them.

      Maybe it’s a cultural thing, but given the cultural differences between Garry’s family and mine which somehow managed to have many similar attitudes toward education and learning, there’s something else going on.

      Right now, most people in the U.S. know absolutely NOTHING about how their government runs. This part of education — civics — was standard in all schools. Somehow, the stupidest people have taken over educating the next generations. If people are stupid now, just imagine how stupid they will be in the future.


      • I was sure that this sort of stuff must be taught in schools. To be fair I’m not sure if it is still taught in our schools either. We have our fair share of ignorant people too of course.
        When I was young I had a penfriend and for a while we used to exchange audio cassettes instead of letters. She was working as a teachers aide I think and took one for her class to hear. Not only were they very shaky about where Australia was but they were very surprised we spoke English. This was in the 80s. Now they have children and probably grandchildren so this is not a new thing but I do think it’s getting worse.


    • I keep asking if stupidity is contagious. Because there more and more of it.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. As a Florida person, I can pretty much confirm that down here it’s even worse than in the rest of the country.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m sorry to say that you’re right.

    Liked by 2 people


  1. THE STUPID IS STRONG IN THIS COUNTRY – Adventures of A Mage In Miami

Talk to me!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: