THE FIFTH EAR AND CHERRY TONGUE

The time has come round again. Our local corn is ripe. You can tell because the price of corn drops abruptly. We used to get ten ears for a dollar, but inflation has arrived, so now they are selling it at five ears for a dollar. I love fresh corn and am always pleased when we can get it fresh and for so little money.

There are only two of us in this house.

“I should buy the fifth ear,” I say, conversationally to the woman shucking corn next to me. “But there are just two of us. What can I do with a fifth ear?”

“I know,” she says. “There are four of us and that fifth ear, well …” She stopped and thought. “It’s pretty good the next day, even cold.”

“True,” I said. And I shucked the fifth ear and tucked it in the bag with the other four. We had two of them yesterday and I cooked three today. One is sitting on the counter. Who will eat it? It might be me. Later, but first … cherries.

It is not just corn season. It’s fresh cherry season. The season is short. You’ve got three, maybe four weeks during which time cherries are delicious and cheap. After that, the price goes up while the quality goes down. I buy as many cherries as I believe I can possibly eat and believe me, that’s a lot of cherries. I knew I was eating a lot of cherries last night when I discovered the tips of my fingers and fingernails are dyed  red.

My tongue is sore.

My tongue started bothering me last week. It felt just like a pizza burn. My lips and gums were also sore. I thought maybe it was the pizza we’d eaten the week before, but as the days dragged on, I began to worry. When you come from a family with a lot of cancer in it — and have had it twice yourself — when something feels strange or wrong, you wonder if you’ve come down with a new form of cancer. Oral cancer? I had been running doom and gloom statistics in my head for the past few days. I decided to comfort myself with a bowl of cherries.

As I was biting down, I could feel a slight burning in my gums and when I pushed the pit out of the cherry, I had an epiphany. My tongue was sore from popping the pits out of cherries. It was also why my tongue, gums, and lips were all hurting. There’s a lot of acid in cherry juice and for the past couple of weeks, I’ve been having a deeply intense and personal cherry experience.

Cherry tongue! My tongue is sore from pushing out pits.

I tapped Garry. He took off his headphones and looked at me.

“My tongue is sore. My lips and gums are sore. It’s the cherries,” I announced.

“I’m sorry. You’ve lost me. Cherries?”

“Yes,” I said. “Cherries. Every day, I’ve been eating a big bowl of cherries and pushing the pits out with my tongue, It has made the tip of my tongue very sore. Where it rubs against the rough cherry pit. And the red stain on my fingers and the soreness in the rest of my mouth? Cherries. It’s all about cherries.”

He looked at me. Thought for a moment. “When,” he said, “will these tragedies stop destroying our lives?”

A fifth ear and an overdose of cherries … no respite in sight! At least, not until the cherry and corn season is over.

SHARING MY WORLD – IT’S MARCH 2016!

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2016 WEEK 9

Welcome to March, the month of floods, mad dogs, the vernal equinox … and my birthday. Carry an ashplant to protect against rising waters. What, didn’t you read “Ulysses ” in college?


Have you done something you truly want to do today?

My Olympus OM-D M-5 arrived today. It isn’t a new camera. It’s refurbished, though it looks and feels brand new. It’s also a version behind the latest one.

I could never afford the latest greatest model. Nor is there such a huge a difference between I and II. I could afford this one. Having this is light-years better than yearning for what I can’t afford.

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The OM-D is surprisingly heavy. I have the PEN E-PL5 and E-PL6. They feel like toys compared to this baby.

I can’t see anything through the viewfinder. I’ll keep trying different eyeglasses until something (hopefully) works. Me and viewfinders is an old, sad story.

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What can you help the world with?

I could explain — again — why term limits are a terrible idea that has failed in the past and would wreak havoc with the future. Or I could just sit around and sigh because people don’t think. They just repeat crap they’ve heard other people say.

If life was ‘just a bowl of cherries’… which fruit other than a cherry would you be..?

I’d be the Dalai Lama. Like this:

The philosopher, tired of seeking truth, yet determined to have it, decides to climb the mountain and get answers from the Big Guy himself. He climbs, and climbs to the Dalai Lama’s home high in the Himalaya mountains.

“Oh wise one,” asks the philosopher, “What is the secret of life?”

“Life,” says the Dalai Lama, “Is a bowl of cherries.”

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“A BOWL OF CHERRIES?@#$%@” cries the anguished philosopher. “I climbed a mountain range for … a bowl of cherries?”

The Dalai Lama calmly regards the man. “So,” he replies, “It’s not a bowl of cherries?”

Quotes List: At least three of your favorite quotes?

“Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.” — Robert Hanlon

“Nothing is certain anymore. Nothing. Chaos is king and magic is loose in the world.” – Robert Heinlein, “Waldo

“You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” — Eleanor Roosevelt

SHARING MY WORLD, MID-SUMMER EDITION

SHARE YOUR WORLD – 2015 WEEK #28

What is your favorite comfort snack food?

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It really depends on the season and my mood. Most of the year, crystallized ginger is the bees knees, but right now, it’s fresh cherries. They are in season for just a couple of weeks and I eat pounds of them until I’m actually sick. I have NO self-control when confronted by cherries.

If you had to spend one weekend alone in a single store but could remove nothing, which store would you pick? (except food or beverage)

Honestly? No idea. Not a clue. I have so little interest in stores and shopping. I can think of lots of things I’d like to do, but this draws a blank. Sorry.

What was the largest city you have been to?  What is the one thing you remember most?

I’ve been to London, which is huge. Gigantic. What I most remember is that you couldn’t get there from here. Those one way systems made moving between different parts of the city a real challenge to a visitor.

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I grew up in New York, which is also pretty big. I loved New York. Museums are the thing I remember best, but there was the ballet and the theater and the guys selling hot chestnuts in front of the library lions. New York was a fabulous place to grow up, offering everything in the way of history, culture, entertainment … and back then, it was affordable. It has changed, as have I, but I’m so glad I had that opportunity. New York contributed a lot to me becoming me.

Finish this sentence:  It has recently come to my attention that the world is … full of idiots. And all of them have a Facebook account.