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CLOSE TO YOU – BY SUE VINCENT

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I think through this quarantine, I was MOST afraid of having to go to the hospital to die alone. I believe a lot of people were afraid to be sick, afraid to see a doctor, afraid of going to a hospital. Hospitals have never been great places to spend time, but now — alone — they are terrifying.

 

Sue Vincent's Daily Echo

pigeons cuddled up

I wander into the kitchen… the world is silent except for the little grunting noises Ani makes as I cuddle her good morning. I don’t speak dog fluently, but I have a feeling these short, low grunts are an expression of affection; you only ever hear them during cuddles and that is how we start our day, the small dog and I.

As the kettle boils I think about the number of people who are, of necessity, home alone this Christmas and New Year, banned from cuddles, separated from their loved ones by regulations and, ironically, a desire to protect their health. When cuddles are good for health. A twenty-second cuddle, I remember reading, does you the world of good on so many levels. I couldn’t recall all the science behind it, but I was prepared to agree unquestioningly that cuddles are good for you. Just having someone close enough…

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Categories: Anecdote

12 replies

  1. curioussteph
    12/27/2020 • 18:00

    I so agree with this, both from a scientific and humanistic standpoint. We NEED contact and tough, and connection. Very challenging to do without for a long time. Birdman of Alcatraz is a good illustration. When presented with solitary, love what you can, connect where you can.

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    • Marilyn Armstrong
      12/27/2020 • 21:52

      And a lot of us are not well-equipped to connect. Computers help — if you are computer-savvy, but a lot of us have never really moved much past playing simple games and doing email.

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  3. Sue Vincent
    12/27/2020 • 04:31

    Thanks for reblogging, Marilyn.

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    • Marilyn Armstrong
      12/27/2020 • 12:22

      It took me a while to realize that it does — even with Owen around and the Duke — that you get lonely. You never see a “new” face and other than Garry, no one every hugs anyone anymore. Who knows when we’ll get vaccinated either so I thought “here’s something to which everyone can relate! It has been a long period of confinement. It’s beginning to feel like a prison term.

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      • Sue Vincent
        12/27/2020 • 13:59

        I know what you mean… and it does feel that way. I think people are still feeling it… it worries me that we will get used to this way of living. I will not accept that.

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        • Marilyn Armstrong
          12/27/2020 • 21:50

          I think for children, it’s downright tragic. This is when they need to be making friends, learning to interact with their world. To communicate, to sympathize and empathize. They literally don’t even know what they are missing. Some of them may never figure it out. Old people and young people are getting hit the hardest by the isolation. Old people because we are isolated anyway be age and infirmity and the young because they are still getting introduced to the world and learning how to become part of it.

          My granddaughter was here today. She looks sad. Not depressed, just … sad. Her life just isn’t moving forward. She is stuck, bored, and frustrated. I can’t even imagine how I’d have reacted to this when I was 24.

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          • Sue Vincent
            12/27/2020 • 21:59

            It is almost always those at either end of life who are the most vulnerable… but while lots of people are writing about the older generations, the young and very young seem to be slipping through the net.

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            • Marilyn Armstrong
              12/28/2020 • 00:13

              I think older people are better able to deal with it. We have years of experience in just dealing with the world in it’s many variations. But the children don’t have experience, can’t fall back on their past to find ways to cope. I feel worst for the ones just emerging into the world — kindergartners, first graders, the ones who need to learn to read and do the basic things they need to survive in the world. They really ARE slipping away.

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