DO YOU RECOGNIZE ME?

I wear eyeglasses. I have worn them since sixth grade, at which time I was about 10 or 11 years old. I have tried contact lenses, but my eyes do not like them. The ridge across the bridge of my nose where my glasses fit is as much a feature of my face as my eyebrows. More, since my eyebrows are changing, getting grayer and bushier, while the eyeglasses are much the same as those I have worn since college.

Superman-ClarkKent-ChrisReeve

About half the time, I take my glasses off if someone is taking my picture. The rest of the time, I forget to remove them because, as I said, they are part of my face.

Thing is, I have learned from DC Comics, that my eyeglasses are actually a disguise. When I am wearing them, no one recognizes me. Even my own husband doesn’t recognize me without eyeglasses. I have asked him many times and he has always confirmed this. It is perhaps one of the strong alternate truths we employ around the house.

When I don’t wear eyeglasses, I have super powers. That’s the deal.

Glasses? Regular person.

No glasses? Super powers.

Except I can’t see without my eyeglasses, so whatever powers my eyeglass-free self has at her command, I can’t do much with them because … I can’t see. Imagine, briefly, Wonder Woman trying to save the day, only to realize that she can’t tell what’s going on because she can’t see anything without spectacles. But — if she puts them on to figure it out, not only does she blow her cover, but she loses her powers. A cruel joke?

Superman-ClarkKent-Bizarro

I have written several letters of complaint to The League of Heroes, but they have not answered me. Perhaps I should ask to speak to a supervisor?

RECOGNIZE | DAILY PROMPT

26 thoughts on “DO YOU RECOGNIZE ME?

  1. I’ve always felt the reverse is true. Without my glasses, I am helpless. With my glasses, I can see into the future (at least the next sixty seconds while driving) and through people’s false fronts. When blurry, all smiles seem earnest. It’s only with accurate lens refraction that I can see the gritted teeth and tight lines at the edges. Glasses are my super power. Not to mention, I can read fantastic works and explore entire galaxies of fictional adventures with my reading glasses. (Reading glasses are the sidekicks of the super-powered bi-focals.) The Justice League is out of their league when it comes to optometry. Try EyeGlassworld instead–they rule. Two pairs of glasses for the price of one!

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  2. This is amazing… So funny… I wear glasses too. I’m practically blind without them. They have become a part of me!!! I guess between tripping and falling without glasses to superpowers, I’d choose the former. A lovely read.

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  3. You got no answer because I told them I was the only hero here and that is just fake news. No seriously, of course we both belong to the league of heroes. Something I must ask. Is the expression “eye glasses” something Americanised, as in the old mother land, England, I just said glasses, or perhaps spectacles although that is an old word for them. I have been wearing them since my eyes discovered the computer, about 30 years old, which now makes it 40 years, and they have got stronger all the time. I never bothered with contacts, but my son wore them in his billard/pool days as they worked better. He would have had to have special glasses for playing to be able to do whatever pool players have to do (I , myself , was quite a good snooker player).

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    • Most people just say “glasses.” When I’m talking, that would be it. I get more formal when I write because in English, glasses are something to see through, but also something to drink from … and I think a few other meanings too … like it also means binoculars and spy-glasses and opera glasses and window panes. Technically, I’m correct, but really, you’re right. It’s just glasses to everyone but me — and you gotta remember — I was a tech writer. I can’t help myself.

      Garry finally has given in and wears glasses. He wore contacts his entire working career because well, you know, on camera and all that and also, he could see a lot better. When they came out with the ones you could wear for a couple of weeks and throw away, then put in new ones, he was practically in heaven. About 12 years ago, he had cataract surgery and they implanted corrective lenses. For about 10 years, he had the eyes of a fighter pilot … except he could not read anything close, not even the labels on the grocery shelves, so he had to wear glasses to read. Wouldn’t you know it? He wore contact a lens OVER one of his implanted lenses to avoid having to wear reading glasses. Finally, now, he still has pretty good vision, but not perfect and he has bifocals for TV and computering. The contacts he needs are very expensive and there are so many other things he needs more … like new hearing aids — which cost thousands of dollars. Choices have to be made. Sad, but true. I think our health insurance carrier offers discounts on certain brands of hearing aids. As soon as the weather is a little more stable, I’ll find out where we have to go to get the discounts. Probably Boston or Providence. Around here, there’s just not a lot of services, the price you pay for living in a small town. Or, at least in this particular small town!

      I want my superpowers! I haven’t jumped a tall building at a single bound in years!

      I was a terrible pool player, but I played a mean game of ping pong and was a pretty good bridge player. Also, I rode horseback reasonably well. I wasn’t a complete loser 🙂

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  4. I used to be nearly legally blind without my glasses. As I get older and my eyes are changing due to age, I find I can actually see a little better without the specs. Does that mean I’m becoming Wonder Woman? If so, I probably should start paying more attention to the bod so I’ll look good in that outfit (if you can picture a gray-haired senior citizen in a Wonder Woman outfit – just try to get that image out of your head now … )

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  5. I like the picture of you with your glasses. You look neat with them. Like you, I’ve worn glass since childhood, then contacts later. Now I only need them for close up. Cataract surgery is one way to gain those super powers again.
    Leslie

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  6. Enjoyed your take on life as it is. I used to wear contacts and can testify your vision is incredible, they make a massive difference. Loved the image of an “older” wonder woman, snickers loudly. Totaly enjoy your humour, awesome!

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  7. I wore glasses from the time I was seven; I needed them deeply, and without them the world was a blur. and as you say, no one could recognize me. Same clothes, same hair, same face. but apparently the eye takes in the most important feature, which in our case is/was the glasses.

    In my late fifties I developed cataracts (and this is where it gets interesting), and in the space of a year I went from glass/dependant to reading glasses. No one ever had trouble recognizing the new, glassless, me.

    The other interesting thing about wearing glasses; many people hide behind them. The glasses give them a kind of protective layer (like the overdone makeup many women wear) against the world. And when I was younger if I took them off in public I felt exposed, truly. After the surgery I never had that feeling.

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    • I was waiting to need cataract surgery so I could get those cool implants too, but so far, I just don’t have cataracts. Maybe the only thing I don’t have.

      When I switched (briefly) to contacts, no one notice. NO ONE. Not even my brother. Which is why I find the whole DC-glasses as a mask thing so funny 🙂

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  8. When I don;t have contacts on and no glasses I cannot see past my hand- all is a blur, which always makes me think no one can see me either. Crazy, but that is always how I feel when the world is a blur!

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    • That’s kind cute, actually. My eyes were much worse when I was younger. Near-sightedness is possibly the only thing that improves naturally with age. I’m surprised i don’t have cataracts since my father had them, but so far, nope.

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